Palin to Keynote Iowa GOP Dinner

Palin to Keynote Iowa GOP Dinner

TheIowaRepublican is reporting that Sarah Palin is keynoting the Iowa GOP's Lincoln silly me - Reagan - Dinner September 17 in Des Moines. Palin in Iowa: sure to be a lamestream media feeding frenzy.

Iowa Democrats, meanwhile, are having their Jefferson-Jackson dinner October 16 and has been dropping hints via Facebook. No, I don't have the scoop; I want to figure it out. Clues so far in order:

This year's JJ speaker was born in New York City in the mid 20th century

This year's speaker has never attended or spoken at our Jefferson Jackson Dinner (which pretty much eliminates all past presidential candidates or Iowa politicians)

This person made a cameo appearance on-screen in a blockbuster hit of the 90s. (I've already eliminated everyone who was in Dave.)

This person has never worked for Saturday Night Live and is not Rudy Giuliani (Al Franken, though born in NYC, had already been eliminated as a past JJ speaker.)

This person is an avid sports fan.

This person served six years in the U.S. Army Reserve.

This person is married with one son.

This person has held local, statewide and national office in their public career.

This mystery is not yet solved, but several sources have confirmed that the squash-stealing varmint is in fact a woodchuck. I am unaware of his wood chucking capacity, assuming such a creature could do so.