Saturday, February 05, 2005

Mixing Politics and Pigskins

Mixing Politics and Pigskins

This installment of the Daily 2008 watch reads almost like an Onion article. Or maybe it's because Senaror George Allen (R-VA) TALKS like an Onion parody.

In the Allen lexicon, growth in payrolls became "more points on the board" and tax cuts meant lower "ticket prices" imposed by the government. And the Democrats? "Constant delay of game, constant holding, constant pass interference and, once in a while, even piling on," he said. The "Democratic huddle" decided "they didn't even want to put their players on the field."

No political situation lacks a football analogue. Years without elections are the "offseason." Primaries are the "preseason." Senate Republicans are President Bush's "teammates." Big political donors join a "Quarterback Club" or a "Special Teams" committee.

After campaign finance legislation ended unregulated donations to political parties, Allen was quoted as saying: "It's a whole new ballgame. There are no more skyboxes. We have to sell individual tickets."


Yeah, yeah, George, we get it. My dad was a coach, too, but I don't try to prove it every sentence.

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