Friday, August 19, 2005

Smallest Farm = Smallest Harvest

Smallest Farm = Smallest Harvest

Haven't reported much on Iowa's Smallest Farm lately - because there has been so little to report. But at last, yesterday, I was able to harvest the bounty of the land:

Four beans.

The VINES are just fine, and I'm even seing blossoms, but by mid-August I should be picking about four QUARTS of beans a DAY, not four BEANS.

But at least I put something in the ground. Now that I have wheels, I may next year investigate rented plots.

Town is coming back to life as the dorms open up and the frats slash sororoties start rush. Lots of t-shirts and shorts, prompting a curmudgeonly rant.

  • Shirts bearing the names and logos of schools or teams should be in official colors ONLY. Hawkeye shirts? BLACK and GOLD. A properly colored logo on a neutral color like black or white or gray is acceptable, but what's with Iowa Hawkeye Shirts in purple or pink?

    (Exeption allowed for the pink Packer gear that's being sold for Deanna Favre's breast cancer fund. That's sanctioned and for a good cause so it's coool. But be sure to get the real thing, with a breast cancer ribbon, otherwise it's a knockoff and no $ goes to the fund.)

  • Concert t-shirts are a special trophy meant to indicate you actually attended the show in question. If you're 19, you were born in 1986 and did NOT attend a show on the 1977 Led Zeppelin US Tour. Led Zep shirt, pledging your retro support to a classic band? Fine. Concert shirt? Only if it's tattered and you stole it from your dad.

  • Pseudo-retro shirts for campy products, shows, etc. that were in fact purchased at the mall. I work hard scrounging through junk shops for genuine retro-cool; you can't mass-produce it.

  • Shorts with words on the back - you know, IO on one cheek and WA on the other. It doesn't matter what the words are, because no matter what the text is, the sub-text is LOOKAT on one cheek and MYASS on the other. And if it's worth a look you don't need the words.

    Enough ranting, time for my Geritol.

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